Remember

Remember this post

when I told the world that I could do it.

That I could be more outgoing.

That this ward change was going to be good for me.

I'm starting to have my doubts.

I mean... I did okay on Sunday.

I drove myself to church (twice)

Once for an interview with the bishopric

(I'm on the mingles committee. I serve food at our mingles [other wise known as lingers])

And then to attend church.

I found myself a seat,

with my old visiting teaching companion,

and met two new people. (that was just in sacrament)

At the mingle I talked,

I talked to quite a few people.

I was proud of myself.

Tonight, FHE..

psh, forget it!

I went back to my old self.

I was scared to leave the house.

I was scared when I got to the activity.

I wanted to turn around and go back home.

Given there was WAY more than just my ward at the activity.

But I was so scared that I couldn't meet anyone.

I really didn't want to go back to my old ways.

But, I'm scared I'm going to.

this song...is how I feel right now. Especially from 3:30 on.