Friday, December 28, 2012

{aspire}

I've been thinking about this topic a lot the past few days.

"Who did you want to be like growing up"
I thought about it, and thought about it.
Then, I remembered.
I remembered exactly who I wanted to be like,
and why I wanted to be like them.
So...
I decided I would share with you,
who I aspired to be like as a youngster, and still do aspire to be like.

I was a strange kid,
I never knew who the most popular actor or actress was.
I didn't get all crazy over the most popular boy band.
Sure,
I enjoyed music, and movies and such,
but I didn't think of the people as more than people.
While most young girls were wanting to be like
(dare I say it...)
Brittney Spears or the Spice Girls. 
There is one special person, who I knew and loved,
that I wanted desperately to be like.

The person that I have aspired to be like the longest,
is my cousin Cassi.
If everyone in the world had the spunk that she has,
and the ability to laugh at anything,
well we'd all be living in a better place.
I tried really hard to remember why I aspired to be like her exactly.
I couldn't really figure it out.
But then,
I remembered some of the silliest reasons why I wanted to be exactly like my older cousin.
The first memory that came to mind,
makes me laugh extremely hard, and I continue to think "really? that's why you wanted to be like her?!"
Back when I was super young, maybe 7...
my parents sent my sister and I down to Payson to spend a week (I think it was that long...)
with my aunt and uncle.  
My aunt was going to teach us how to swim.
I was deathly terrified to learn to swim, so I never got further than doing the motor boat in the shallow end.
Cassi was in her teen years at this point, so I don't think she was around much.
I remember mostly spending time with her sisters Tracie and Emily.
But I do remember this... (please, remember I was just a little girl)
Cassi had just gotten out of the shower,
and walked past Emily and I playing in Emily's room,
and I remember looking up and Cassi had her hair wrapped in her towel, a top her head,
and I remember thinking that was THE coolest thing ever!!
Like who wraps their hair like that!
At that moment, I told myself I wanted to be like her when I grew up!
Well...grow up I did.
Do I wrap my hair in a towel after showering? I sure do.  
Is it because Cassi did? Probably not...but we'll just say it is.
I remember Cassi cutting our families hair when she worked at a salon up this way.
It was the first time she had cut our hair, 
and the first time I had seen her in a long time.
We walked into the salon and I was awestruck when I saw her.
She was sporting a cute little bob haircut,
it was blonde on top and a deep maroonish red on the bottom.
I thought she was the coolest, all over again!
When we left the salon I begged and pleaded to be able to get my hair done like that one day!
My mom would never allow it.
So. I never cut my hair into a bob, or dyed it that outrageously. (Maybe one day)
After that experience,
I didn't see Cassi for a very long time.
In fact, I don't think it was until my sister got married that I really saw her again.
I think it was through Facebook that we started talking,
and then she came to the wedding with her dad and our Grandpa.
She came and hung out at the guestbook table with me,
and we talked and laughed like we had seen each other the day before.
Soon after we began texting each other a lot.
Then,
I started having her cut my hair,
or I would make random trips to Provo on the weekend to hang out with her family.
I spent a good portion of my weekends during the summer before I moved to Ephraim 
sitting in her living room playing with her kids,
and talking to her and her husband.
I remember one time my friends and I drove to Provo to visit a friend who was doing the summer
semester at BYU. 
I made my friends go to a bakery with me, so I could buy some cookies,
to take to my cousins husband who had just had shoulder surgery.
Then, when I went, I spent probably 10 minutes inside talking to them,
and left my friends in the car.
Due to busy lives and such we lost touch a little bit,
but have recently started talking a bit more recently.
Her and her husband give me recommendations of what movies to watch on Netflix,
and she tells me other ways to stay entertained while I'm laid up.
One thing that really amazed me though,
as we were talking the other day about TV shows on Netflix,
she brought up a conversation we had three years ago,
about what TV shows we liked and didn't like.
I remember having that conversation now,
but at the time I was like WHAT?!?! How do you know I like Hannah Montana and hate Phineus and Ferb.
It was heart-warming to know that such a simple conversation was remember three years later.
She's also the reason why I got so serious about photography,
can't forget that little detail!

I know my reasonings for wanting to be like Cassi 
are silly and immature.
But really,
I think I aspired to be like her because of 
her spunky personality,
her laughter,
and genuine concern about people.
(Okay, maybe I feel extra connected to her because we both have the ability to touch are tongues to our noses and I remember spending hours seeing how high we could get them.)
Cassi is an amazing lady,
an amazing mother,
just amazing.
I may wrap my hair in a towel like Cassi 
I may not have reached the level of crazy hairstyles like she did.
But I still aspire to be like her.
Strong willed.
Loving.
Caring.
Being able to find humor in life.

Love ya Cass Bass!


So, who did you aspire to be like growing up?

2 comments:

  1. Your reasons aren't immature or silly whatsoever!! I love when you're all, "Do I wrap my hair like that? I DO! Is it because of her? Probably not but we'll just say it is." I love this. She seriously seems like a great girl & awesome example. I aspire to be like this girl that was in my family ward, Bailey. She is literally stunning & does everything with love. Thanks for making me think about that! It helps with resolutions too! Happy New Year, Jana!

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  2. WOW!!I can't believe you would pick me but I am truly touched. My version of my is quite different, haha, as my family says I am completely crazy, but I feel you should give you one great piece of my knowledge. I wish I could say I learned this easily but it came from a dark time in my past, one I am not ashamed of since it made me who I am.
    Try and always be you, never try to change just to please someone, or to try to impress someone. Remeber that you are beautiful just being you. That is doesn't matter what you wear, what matters that you love you. I loved dressing crazy in clothes that were bright and stood out, but many thought it was odd.
    I learned that being me and proud of it, got me so much farther then trying to be like everyone else. At the end of the day be the best person you can be.
    DO not judge others as you do not know what life is like for them, and each of us has different trails. When I was a teen many judged me just by the outside appearance and didn't get to know me on the inside. Something thing great came of it though.
    So as Dr Seuss said it much better " Why try to fit in when you were born to STAND OUT!"
    LOVE YOU!!!!

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